Fiordland.

Perhaps the most renowned stretch of country in NZ in Fiordland and the west coast of South Island. The ultimate Great Walk, the Milford Track of amazonian rainfall levels and sandflies scarier than Cheney on a hunting trip beckons, and if four days of walking isn't your thing then the cruises on Milford and Doubtful Sounds should provide ample fodder for your vacation photo gladiatorial fests back home. With good reason. This place is gorgeous. Just flat out gorgeous.

Due to my tendency to wander down every dirt road I see I actually did not spend a great deal of time in Milford this trip, but the journey there was well worth it. I have found a road which they strongly recommend no one in possession of their wits take, so we are already planning an expedition. Plus I see a trip down the Hollyford track in the near future, perhaps following a wintertime walk along the Abel Tasman. But for now, this will have to tide us all over.


Dawn in Bluff. Not much here but the south end of the island. Methinks it is enough.


McCracken's rest along the South Shore.

Lake Hauoroko. Had lunch here and in two hours did not see another human. Did meet sandflies. I will never bitch about Alaska mozzies again.

A Tekahe in a wildlife center in Te Anau. Something like 200 of these beautiful critters left, but the Kiwis have set aside a huge range for their benefit. Yet we can't set aside a few islands to help save 20,000 Polar Bears. Dear God.

Lake Te Anau.

The entrance to the Milford Sound area.

This place is so beautiful that miniature heavens like this don't even rate a parking spot.

A Kea. Alpine parrot (yes, alpine parrot) and likely the smartest birds in the world, at least in human terms. This guy walked right over to me and wanted an almond. I had yet to see all the signs telling me what a faux pas it is to feed one of these guys, so I gave him one.

One almond and he wants to come home with me. Reminds me of the Castle Street crowd.

The falls a few hundred meters from the end of the Hollyford road. Highest road accessible falls in the Pacific. Apparently even more spectacular during the normal daily deluge in this region.

No filters here, the water is actually this crayola-esque color.

This is why I want to do the Hollyford more than the Milford. I have seen mountains, grew up in the Rockies and have bummed around most of Alaska and the Canadian north. But jungle? Temperate jungle with no poisonous beasties? That, that I can spend some time in.

I walked around this foothill and for the first time in my life was mugged by the weather. I swear, the damn storm was literally hiding around the corner waiting. I strolled around in my shorts and sunglasses and it hit me like a shotgun wedding. I love the weather in Alaska because it taught me that nature really doesn't care if I live or die, that I am not the center of the universe. But after having an entire cold front lay in wait for me I might have to rethink my position. Perhaps, like everything else south of the equator, it has something to do with the Coriolis effect.

So come to South Island at least once. See this glorious little bit of the universe. Spend some money. You'd just waste it on crap you don't need otherwise, and the Kiwis are, almost certainly, better people than that sleazy plasma screen salesman down at Best Buy. They actually invest it in things like parks, wildlife conservation, and financing toga riots. If you spend it in the States you know that eventually Kissinger gets his cut. Henry K. is old school that way. So dodge that moral peril and come hang. We will enjoy ourselves. Just don't bring any nukes, they are still a bit touchy about that.

So the winter comes.

The weather is turning fast and the looks are getting more quizzical as I continue to wear shorts on the -6C days. The old Alaska response is getting old, perhaps I can plead a neurological oddity? Rainy today, but generally beautiful even as the frost gets thicker in the mornings. I keep promising them a blizzard, we'll see if my luck holds.

This is a small big town, or perhaps it just the campus scene that is tight. An example: On Saturday I did my show on 91FM, then headed to the farmer's market. It was cool, but pleasant. My brain works best at an external temp around 5C so I was feeling pretty good. Stopping to buy some venison the vendor, done up in his down jacket and gloves, takes exception to my t-shirt and shorts. I tell him the Alaska trope and buy my salami. Went downtown to the annual J-day act of civil disobedience, then strolled the Botanicals and went home. Saturday night I arise to go catch a songwriter's showcase called Pages of Dunedin (very, very good) where I run into Doug and Edwina, University staff I have met. We meet some other friends of theirs after the show and head for a bar. While sitting there their friend Ran asks where I am from, I tell him Alaska. His eyebrows shoot up and he asks if I was buying venison at the farmer's market today. Hesitantly I agree that I was and ask how he knows. He states that when he went to buy some salami from the same guy they chatted about the weather and the vendor told him all about some crazy Alaskan in a t-shirt and shorts that had just slouched by. Then Ran bought me a drink. Feeling that this was just one of those weird things you run into I head for the bog. Coming out, a young long-hair stops me and asks if I was at Cannibal Bay several weeks ago, which in fact I was (picture below). He states that he and his friends were there and I had said hello as I walked past. Then he bought me a drink.

Clearly the locals need a bit more excitement in their lives. I can't remember the names of the people I have eaten with for two months now, and I get picked out of a crowded bar after saying hello on an isolated beach a month earlier? But I can't fault their generosity with alcohol. Actually, I can't fault the kiwis for much of anything. At least the non-Castle Street Kiwis.

I have skipped down to the Catlins over two weekends since I have been here. South of us, it is relatively undeveloped and people are scarce. The place is gorgeous, with some of the largest pieces of Native forest left in New Zealand and coastlines you wouldn't believe. Apparently this is what the Dunedin area used to look like as well, before they became infected with stinky monkeys.

Open up this picture. The pool in the middle has a group of juvenile seals playing inside. I watched these kids for half an hour from the trail.

Sea Lions don't wake gracefully. This is the aforementioned Cannibal Beach. I like naming places things like this. It makes development hard. "Seaside condos at Cannibal Beach" just doesn't roll off the tongue right.


Jack's blowhole, 200 m inland, a collapsed sea cave 155 m long and 55 m deep.

Sea caves are pretty common along the beach, lots of sandstone and limestone in the cliffs.

McLean Falls. Good name.

The winds here come straight from Antarctica. It shows.

The temperate rain forests here are incredible. Amazingly lush but with very little fauna. Quiet but for the birds.

Yet even here, like everywhere, you have to accept the reality of traffic.